i'm stupid. ok. i admit it. stupid stupid stupid stupid. okay. i know i've said before that i'd never cut myself, (i think when i did all those quizilla things), but... things change... i guess i was lying in the first place because i have kinda cut before. Oh, this is so weird writing this. i've cut the word "why" into my palm (its tiny) twice now, (once at the end of january and again last week). and today, i don't know where it came from, i razored my wrist. it was stupid, completely stupid. I'd tried before with sissors but all they did was scratch and nothing serious, so i thought, 'its not like its going to do much' and then just... well... and it bled. luckily i've made a habit of wearing a sweat band so no one will ever know. stupid stupid stupid. i am the queen of stupid.
i hate feeling like this but it happens all the time. not feeling stupid... but the feeling where i know i would/could do something like that. i don't want to die...

do i?